Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Writing Advice: Tips On How to Write Sex Scenes




            We've all read at least one romance novel in our lives. Writing romantic, love scenes is actually harder (no pun intended) than one might think. 



  Books I Recommend:

    1. Thinking Like a Romance Writer by Dahlia Evans (*this one is the most helpful actually)

    2. How To Write Hot Sex by Shoshanna Evers

    3. The Evolution of a Sex Scene by Kristen Luciani 

    4. The SEXaurus: Sexy Words for Writers by Stephanie Olsen and Tamari Robins


    I got these on Kindle editions because they are much cheaper in that format. 



   Personal Tips:

    1. Most important tip of all: You need to be in the mood. It's about passion, which goes for anything you write but when you're feeling especially horny you find yourself feeling extra creative. What I do is hold off on any self love (we're all adults so you know what I mean) to build myself up then write down all the horny images in my head and edit it when I'm sober enough. I also get in the mood at a certain time of day which is the perfect time to write down all the sex scenes I'm thinking about then add other stuff later the next day. 


    2. Wear sexy underwear. As I've said: Be in the mood before you write a sex scene. When you feel sexy then you write sexy! 


    3. Watch a lot of porn. For some you may get uncomfortable with this but it's a great help to give you a visual to better describe the action (though for romance you also have to focus on the emotion of the characters more). A porn site I recommend: For Her Tube. Look for the Soft Core channel. (But careful of viruses. You know how many porn sites have those pesky viruses so be careful on what you click on).


    4. You don't have to make it magically romantic like your characters climax all the time or always together. You can make the sex a little more realistic (unless that's your plot in which case skip this tip). In my one scene of Sirens of the Belt Prequel Pt 7, my character Constance has sex for the first time but doesn't climax. It's her first time having sex. Sex doesn't really hurt the first time for most women (unless you're doing it wrong or the person your with doesn't know what they're doing). 


    5. If you're story involves BDSM I highly recommend doing some research into the subject. 50 Shades of Grey is not the best example. People of the BDSM community actually hate that series. A book I suggest is BDSM Basics for Beginners by Michelle Fegatofi. I'm currently setting up an outline for a romance novel that includes this type of kink and this book is very helpful. Also read other BDSM novels as a guide.  


     You don't have to be sexually active to know how to write about sex. It's whatever your fantasy is. 

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